19 May Creative ways to hide your sexy little secrets from curious guests
We all have our kinks, our fetishes, and our turn-ons. And, although we aren’t ashamed of them, we don’t really want people to know about them. Especially if those people are friends and family. So, thanks to my vast experience in hiding sex toys and other similar equipment, I can enlighten you on how to keep your secret pleasures secret.
I’m the first to say that everyone should enjoy sex the way they want, without shame, and without guilt. But, trust me, and I speak from experience, you don’t want to go through that awkward moment when your grandmother grabs your dolphin vibrator and says “What a strange little toy.” I mean sure, she had no business snooping around my bathroom, but, these things will happen. And you will, just as I have, blush and curse yourself for not finding a better place for the dolphin.
Whether you live alone, with roommates, or you have kids, you need a hiding place for your toys. If you don’t want your anal beads to be a conversation starter, check out these tips and tricks. They will help you keep your sex toys away from curious eyes.
1. Hide a swing
If you have a sex swing, and you even pierced some hooks in your ceiling for it, you might need to go 007 here in order to hide those eye hooks in plain sight. I mean, just taking the swing off is definitely not going to cut it. The swing can have a place in a boxunder your bed, and you’re good. But, if you don’t want people guessing what those hooks are for, you can disguise them. You can mount fake smoke detectors over them or hang a planter holder. Or, if you’re really lazy, just hang fairy lights and a couple of
paper lanterns on them.
2. BDSM toys and accessories
You can just leave those handcuffs, whips, and ropes lying around, but then your guests will know within seconds why you’re in such a good mood. If you don’t want people to know what you’re doing behind closed doors, BDSM toys can be easily stored away in a handy pillow. Just find one of those special pillows with hidden compartments, and no one will ever know.
Now here, you have a world of options. You can put a cracker box on your nightstand and stash a vibrator in there. You can get one of those mascara or USB shaped models and leave them carelessly wherever. Or, you can even get one of those Hide a Vibe plushies. A plush toy with a compartment for your vibrating buddy. If you’re a fan of standard vibrators with no bells and whistles, you can always hide it in your drawer.
4. Fleshlights and sex dolls
Luckily, most people still don’t know what fleshlights are, so you can hide yours out in the open. Just toss a cotton handkerchief over it and put some pens in – no one will suspect your pencil holder of being a sex toy. Now, sex dolls are a different matter altogether. If people see a human-sized doll in your home, they will get the point in an instant. So, if your doll is inflatable – deflate it and put it in a box. If it’s made of silicone, you need a place like the top of a closet, or under a bed. If you don’t have enough room in those places, you can just put the doll in your bed, cover it and say a mate is ill.
Well, that’s it from me, but I’d love to hear where you’re hiding your toys.